Life is odd. And sometimes the sweetest person on earth grabs your heart but things just aren't... appropriate. After all, if you love someone, you should be together? Good... not consistently. Relationships finish for lots of reasons other than adulterous or betrayal — occasionally they end for no reason at all. Particularly when the love is undoubtedly present, it’s never easy to know if you should end it.
And there’s the heartbreak. I broke up with someone who was, in my opinion, probably the nicest man ever. It wasn't right, and it wasn't reasonable to waste either of our time.
Things not feeling "right" is an entirely legitimate reason to break up with someone. According to eHarmony, if you've got to attempt to convince yourself to stay in a relationship, you likely should not be even if nothing specific has occurred to make you upset with your partner. Sometimes the end has nothing to do with the person you're dating and everything regarding you and where you might be in your life. Love is not always the issue. You may never know for sure if you’re doing the right thing at the instant when a relationship ends.
1. You are Just Not Joyful
The heart wants what the heart desires. Sometimes what the heart wants is not your wonderful, magnificent, considerate, humorous partner. Occasionally what the heart wants is always to break up with the lazy, egotistical, condescending love of your life who's just so bloody cute and charming. Something is for sure, you do not ever have to remain with anyone simply because you don't desire to break their heart.
2. You Want Things that are Distinct
Kids. Jobs. Buying houses. These are major choices that you both need to be on board with. No matter how much you love someone, sometimes life takes you in different directions. If you really need that job on another side of your partner and the world really doesn't want to leave, you don't have to compromise. Lots of couples figure that stuff out, but some can not. It might mean it's time to go forward.
3. You Keep Thinking About It
You don't have to have a motive. Then it is time to go if you just can't stop feeling like you do not desire to be in the relationship even if you can't put your finger on why. You may also feel relieved, although you might feel sad. Both feelings are normal, in accordance with The Catholic University of the Wellness Center of America.
4. You Can Not Resolve Your Problems
You try and try, but you keep fighting over the exact same things. Or that one big thing. And no matter what happens, you never resolve it. And you can not get past it. And it is overshadowing all the things that are great. You can not require your partner to change, according to psychologist and UCLA professor Andrew Christensen. Before things get worse if you actually can't get past your difficulty or if it is something that requires a huge change that you don't want to make, then maybe it is time to part ways.
5. You are Not Getting What You Want
Some people can't do long-distance relationships. They want routine physical affection and the type of attention you can only give in person. Many people fall in love with quiet, stoic types, then recognize they can't deal with the deficiency of talking about feelings. A number of people fall in love with individuals who don't have similar needs in bed or who never need to do anything they desire to do.
If you are needs aren't being met, they're not being met, although these could be the most wonderful, kind, rockstar partners on the planet. It is OK to place your needs at the top of your life precedence list. Just ensure that you take some time to think about your relationship, including what you desire prior to starting dating again and what went wrong, based on pupil health services California State University Long Beach.
6. You're Being Abused
It is a fact many individuals do not like to talk about, but it is not unusual to feel sadness and loss after cutting ties with someone who's mentally, physically or sexually violent, according to the National Domestic Violence Hotline. That does not mean you should stick around, however. It just means that you'll need to process your emotions and mourn the lack of the great aspects of your relationship just like every other break up. Maltreatment is a definite dealbreaker but it isn't an off-switch for emotions.
Breakups are never simple, but they're even tougher for the individual left if you still deeply care. If you come to the decision which you have to leave a relationship, remember to trust your gut, take a deep breath, and that taking care of yourself is the most important thing. Always.